Please Be Still My Beating Heart

Oh no, guys. It's shaping up to be one of those nights. You know, those kind of nights.

The nights where I stay up late, eat too much candy, and write posts like this. I'm going to try and show some restraint tonight and not get riled up about an article of clothing. Admittedly, though, I do have a bunch of leftover Easter candy sitting next to me, and as sure as the sky is blue all of the candy will be in my tummy tonight. I don't know why I do this to myself, because every time I eat too much candy I get an awful stomach ache and end up almost puking. How fun, right?

In news that isn't related at all to my stomach, Netflix has updated their library recently with a whole slew of cartoons from my childhood. I think I screamed yesterday when I saw that Chowder season 1 was available for streaming. That AND they have Total Drama Island (I KNOW YOU'RE JUDGING ME AND I DO NOT CARE), plus many, many more. I have a lot of fond memories centered around these television programs, and I'm still debating whether or not this is a testament to how I spent my time as a preteen.

I think I was probably in sixth grade when TDI came out. I didn't follow the series, but I did watch the episode reruns on the weekends whenever I could. I had a HUGE crush on Gwen, and don't even get me started on some of the other characters on that show. One of the reasons I didn't watch the show the night it aired was because I was afraid that my parents would get mad at me for watching a show that used words like "crap". Ah, what a silly 12 year old I was.

As for Chowder, that was around while I was in seventh grade. At first I had dismissed the show as being stupid, but as I watched it more often, the more I fell in love with the characters. I'm really disappointed that Cartoon Network didn't give that show a longer run. In 7th grade I think I may have had even less friends than I do now, and Chowder was my own little escape during the weekends, when I didn't have to think about life, school, or any of my other worries.

TL;DR
I used to watch a bunch of television and I'm feeling all sappy about it today while I eat old candy and I'm trying desperately to not think about life right now buT IT IS NOT REALLY WORKING OH NO.

EDIT: WHAT UP, I JUST REALIZED I CAN USE THE "POOR REALITY TELEVISION SHOW CHOICES" TAG FOR THIS POST. FOURTH APPLICABLE POST, BITCHES.

Next Food Network Star

Note: I pulled this one out of the vault (more commonly referred to as my 'drafts' folder) and I finished it. Since I wrote it on Monday of this week, each time I refer to last night I am talking about Sunday :3

I really need to stop watching television. Even though I rarely use the 'poor reality television show choices' post tag, I'm going to have to pull it out again today.

For the past four or so years, each Sunday night starting in May, my mother and I tune into the 'Next Food Network Star' competition. In years past it has proven to be a nice distraction from homework, and in the middle of summer it gives me something to do when thunderstorms keep me inside. The problem is that this year, they've changed the rules. Before there were 15 or so contestants, and three judges, and each week there was a challenge, one would get axed, etc.

Now, though, there's teams. Each team has five members (one is a group of four now after the elimination last night). There is a team leader for each team who acts as a mentor of sorts to the contestants. After the challenge each week, the judges (there's only two now) choose a winning team, and all of those people are immune for that week. From the two remaining teams the judges choose the weakest member on each, and they have a cook off. From there the judges choose a winner, and who is sent home. Even though I've only seen one episode, I'm guessing that's how it'll be each week. Don't get me wrong, here, I don't mind change that much, it's just that I really liked the way the show was set up before.

Another thing that really bothers me, no matter what television show I watch, is that before I really get to know the contestants, whenever one of them makes a mistake, it's unbearable for me. It's just so...awkward. Last night I literally had to leave the room when one of the guys forgot to pick up one of the ingredients he needed at the grocery store. It's also really awkward for me when I'm trying to watch them compete in front of the camera when they have their video challenges. I swear to god I almost had an aneurysm last night from how stressed out I got trying to watch that show.

Also, I have a theory that Bobby Flay's team is going to win. Just hear me out: One of the remaining judges is Susie  Fogelson, and from her behavior last season, I have every reason to believe that she is going to favor Team Bobby. Just go look back at every episode from the last season of "Next Food Network Star" and tell me she isn't flirting with him, her fellow judge, the whole entire time. She got a choice seat next to Mr.Flay at the judges table, and you could totally see she was enjoying it. Just look at her in this picture:

Honey, he's not even looking at you. 

Seriously, I need to lay off reality t.v. for awhile, before it kills me.

The Duggar Family Has Done It Again

Last night, I was on youtube, and some of the videos that were "suggested" for me were videos of the TLC show '19 Kids and Counting'. Having seen the show a few times before on television, I clicked on one, not thinking much of it. More than three hours later, I had watched more than three episodes of the show, including the 90 minute special where the oldest son's wife has her first child. Then it just kept getting worse from there.

My friend joined in on the madness too, and we watched the Duggar's adventures until approximately 2:30 in the morning. All I have to say about this experience is that I learned that the Duggar's are crazy. I honestly can't understand why they don't stop having children. I know that they love all of their kids, but after the high-risk birth of her nineteenth child, and the miscarriage of her 20th, I can't help but feel that her body is trying to tell her "No, stop it!". I suppose another thing I learned is that there are a wide variety of Michelle Duggar parodies circulating throughout cyberspace. Some of them were hilarious. Others, just weird. Lizzie, who also wrote a post about the Duggars, requested I create a visual aid for this post. Here goes nothing...

In all honesty I didn't want to post this picture. I guess it's my fault for showing it to Lizzie in the first place. Or maybe it's my fault for drawing it to begin with. Hm... Oh! As a side note, I am extremely pleased to be able to use the post tag 'poor reality television show choices' again. It's been too long, really it has. 

America's Next Top Model... how could you?!

I was feeling solemn today on my last Friday of Winter break, so I decided to mourn by watching an all-day marathon of America's Next Top Model: Cycle 14.

First of all, if there is one thing in this world that is brain-numbing, it is watching all those models for eight hours straight. None of them seemed to know what they were talking about 80% of the time. They were all so busy being catty and accusing one another of random misdeeds that none of them realized that they were being total hipocrites. There was back-stabbing, double-crossing, and straight out treachery. All of those girls were put into one house together, and they could just not seem to be able to figure out how to get along. I could not believe it.

After sitting on my couch for that long, I knew that I needed to get up and do something else-- anything. But then I remembered that I had to return to school again on Monday, and my will to do something productive disappeared. I kept my butt on my couch and continued watching the trials and tribulations of the models and working on this bracelet.

One by one as they were kicked off, the challenges kept getting more and more eccentric. In one of the challenges the models had to stand in a field with a wild animal. Why were they with a wild animal? Yeah, I don't know either. And Tyra Banks kept giving unclear instructions to the models. I for sure had no idea what she was talking about, and no else seemed to know for half of the time, either.

"Ladies, you need to use your neck to your advantage! Right now you look a little [makes odd gestures], when you need to be listening to what the camera is saying, you need to [makes another unclear gesture]. "


That is basically what Tyra did, in some variation, for each episode. It drove me INSANE. I almost found myself shouting at the television "JUST TELL THEM WHAT THEY'RE DOING WRONG!". Perhaps she was just having an off day. For every episode of that season. It is for this reason that I much prefer to watch Project Runway. Not only do the contestants not make me want to pull out all my hair, I understand the judge's critiques.

Maybe I'm just out of touch. Yeah, that's probably it.



Unrelated Side Note: I have made it my goal to post 100 times in 2012! Wish me luck! What, you think I can't do it? WELL WATCH ME!!